Alternative ways to resolve a conflict


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The Other 10% Of Life Is Following Up

There is an old saying most often attributedBe  Polite
to Woody Allen that "90% of life is showing
up." Actually, it turns out that the numberWhen calling someone, ask whether the timing
is somewhere between 75 and 90, depending onis convenient. If not, thank them and end the
the recollection of the person reciting thecall. If they have a minute, take it, but not
quote, but either way, the balance of life ismuch more. Learning about the person you are
about  following  up.calling is also a courteous gesture. Be sure
to understand his or her business/practice
Allen's point is a good one. Just getarea (a Google search should suffice) and try
involved, make the call, or introduceto find some memorable common ground
yourself. The results will astonish you. In(something as simple as practicing in the
fact, once you take the initiative, momentumsame city may work, but being alumni of the
alone  can  drive  you  toward  your  goal.same school or residents of the same town is
ideal). The key is to be yourself in the most
Where many of us falter, however, is in thepositive way that you can while relating to
follow-up. We expect to be rewarded for ourthe person you are contacting on both a
risk taking, not realizing that success isprofessional  and  personal  level.
the product of both good ideas and great
execution. That execution requires you to beBe  Succinct
one part relentless telemarketer (in the most
respectful way, of course), one part superOnce you find common ground, get to the
cheerleader (without the pom-poms) and onepoint. Chitchat is fine, but your goal is to
part Zen master (to control the anxiety), allfollow up on whatever you original request
of which are contrary to traditional legalmay have been. Your contact knows you are
training.calling out of the blue for a specific reason
and is giving you an opportunity to share it.
Even the most successful among us getTake the opportunity and run. Describe
rejected the first few times we attemptexactly what you are following up on and why
something. That rejection is usually not ait  is  important for him or her to consider.
reflection of the merits of an idea or
strategy. More often, it is simply a functionBe  Resilient
of poor timing. If someone sends you a letter
thanking you for your resume and advisingIf (when) you get rejected, don't over
that there are presently no openings, it isanalyze that judgment. The best action you
very possible that there really are nocan take is to send a thank you note and move
openings. Our collective instinct is toforward. Immediately follow up with the next
assign another meaning to that message andperson on your list. You will eventually
consider it a negative judgment on ourspeak with someone at a time that is
qualifications. Next time, consideringconvenient for him or her, and who has a
following up with a thank you note and checksincere  interest in what you are discussing.
back  in  a  few  months.
Evaluate  Your  Performance
The great follow-up balancing act is to
control the urge to call or e-mail someoneAlthough it is a mistake to criticize
ten times per day, but fight the complacencyyourself for rejection, the great achievers
of making contact once and giving up. Hereand connectors use it as a chance for
are some tips to manage the follow-uppersonal-evaluation. Have you mastered your
process.pitch? Is your tone authoritative? Be
honest.
Establish  a  Schedule
In the end, the key is to follow up in a way
Between classes or billable hours, you mustthat demonstrates thoughtful commitment to
schedule items you need to complete. To-dothe issue, but flexible understanding of the
lists are fine, but I would suggest using ancircumstances surrounding that level of
electronic calendaring system of some sortcontact. You already get 90% for showing up,
with reminders. If you speak with someonework for the extra 10% and you will be
about a job or client developmenthandsomely  rewarded.
opportunity, add a follow-up e-mail or phone
call to your calendar. It could be a month,This article was originally published on
it  could  be  six,  just  keep  in  touch.April 14, 2008 by the National Law Journal
online.



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