Alternative ways to resolve a conflict


Divorce Roadmap: The Route Around the Legal System

Let's look at how a divorce case works so youcourt time with them. That's all there is to
can see what you face and how you can beatit. With a little help, almost anyone can do
the legal system. The legal divorce processtheir own uncontested divorce.Contested
is similar in all states, but there are twodivorces are another matter entirely. There
common sets of terms. In this article, I useare lots of steps in a contested case and
the first set.Spouse who starts the divorce =each step is quite complex. They include
Petitioner  or  Plaintiffpre-trial motions, discovery, negotiations,
manadatory custody mediation, pre-trial
settlement conference, and finally, the
trial. This is lawyer country; you can't go
Document  filed  =  Petition  or  Complaintthrough a contested divorce very effectively
without one. It takes lots of time, money and
emotional suffering to get through a
contested  divorce.
The  other  spouse = Respondent or Defendant
Any contested case can become uncontested if
one spouse simply drops out of the contest or
if the spouses reach an agreement--the
Document filed (if any) = Response or Answerearlier, the cheaper. However, when you are
represented by attorneys, it is much more
difficult to reach agreement. When
negotiations are conducted through attorneys,
Orders for divorce and terms = Judgment orit is typical for a case to drag on and on
DecreeAll divorces start with a Petition andand run up large attorneys' fees before it
end with a Judgment. The Petition sets out insettles.Advantages to a Legal ContestIt might
very general terms what the facts and issuesseem odd after all I've said, but there are
are and what the Petitioner wants. Aftersome advantages to a contested divorce in
being filed with the court, it is served onsome  cases:
the other spouse to give notice that the case
has started. The Petition is a simple,
standard document. Filing and serving it is
not complicated.The other spouse can now fileIn high-conflict cases, you can get some
a Response if he or she wants to be involvedrestraining orders.If your spouse is playing
in the legal process. This has to be donehardball, it may be better to fight rather
within a stated time, typically 30 days afterthan give in.Fighting is an outlet for or
the Petition is served. The Response isdiversion from the pain of divorce.Anger and
similar to the Petition, a simple documentfighting help sever bonds of attachment and
that is easy to do. The effect of theaffection.
Response is simply to get the other spouse
into the case on an equal footing with theIn some states, there is a chance for
Petitioner.If a Response is filed, the casematerial gain--if you win.And, finally, some
is "contested." If there is no Response, itpeople just feel like fighting.If you have to
is assumed that the Respondent concedes allfight, Divorce Solutions: How to Make Any
issues according to the broad terms of theDivorce Better (the book from which this
Petition and the case is "uncontested." Ifarticle was excerpted) discusses how to run a
the couple has made a written maritalcontrolled battle effectively and how to
settlement agreement before the Petition isavoid some of the worst disadvantages.The
filed, there won't be any reason for thedisadvantages to a legal contest, however,
second spouse to enter the case.As you canare  truly  impressive:
see, there are only three ways you can go
through the legal system from Petition to
Judgment:
Both sides get drained financially and
emotionally.Two lawyers double the
personalities in the case and increase the
You go with an attorney through the legalcomplexity of every communication, making
system to trial where a Judge will imposesettlement much more difficult.Kids can get
decisions about property, children andharmed, perhaps permanently; chances for
support.More commonly, you will go throughcooperative co-parenting in the future will
the legal system until your attorney canbe seriously impaired.Imposed terms are often
negotiate an agreement with your spouse'snot adhered to, so you end up in more
attorney about property, children andhassles, spending more money and time on
support. Once you have an agreement, allenforcement.Your upset becomes entrenched,
that's left is a lot of paperwork and redruns deeper and lasts longer. Since your real
tape.Do it yourself. This means that you andgoal is to get on with your life, this holds
your spouse work out an agreement outside theyou  back  and  down--perhaps  forever.
legal system with only limited assistance
from attorneys. As you will see from myNow that you know the route around the legal
articles on divorce, doing it yourself has sosystem for a divorce, you are ready for my
many advantages that it is by far the bestarticle  Divorce--How  to  Beat  the  System.
way of all.Contested and uncontested divorces
are  dramatically  different:
Copyright 2005 Ed ShermanEd Sherman is a
family law attorney, divorce expert, and
The uncontested divorce is relativelyfounder of Nolo Press. He started the
simple: it goes straight through paperworkself-help law movement in 1971 when he
and red tape to judgment. Some couples willpublished the first edition of How to Do Your
need to work out a written marital settlementOwn Divorce, and founded the paralegal
agreement beforehand. A routine appearance inindustry in 1973. With more than a million
court by Petitioner may be required, but manybooks sold, Ed has saved the public billions
states, such as California, have simplifiedof dollars in legal fees while making divorce
procedures that typically don't require ago more smoothly and easily for millions of
hearing--uncontested cases are so routinereaders. You can order his books from or by
that they don't want to take up valuablecalling (800) 464-5502.



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