| When you engage in child custody mediation, you can | | | | work right in the courthouse, and you may be able to |
| choose between many different types. | | | | see one by just walking down the hall. These |
| Facilitative mediation | | | | mediators typically are limited to giving you only a few |
| Facilitative mediation gives you maximum control over | | | | hours of time, and to only mediating the most basic |
| the outcome. In this type of mediation, the mediator's | | | | issues of custody and visitation. |
| role is limited to ensuring that all relevant information is | | | | Because court-appointed mediators rarely charge |
| exchanged between you and the other parent and | | | | more than a small fee, you can save a lot of money |
| that settlement offers are transmitted back-and-forth. | | | | with them. Unfortunately, in some states, the mediator |
| The mediator may suggest solutions if you and the | | | | may be asked to make a recommendation, which will |
| other parent seem to be stuck over an issue. | | | | put pressure on the parents to reach an agreement |
| Mediation withdrawal. Many states allow parents to be | | | | during the sessions. |
| excused from mediation if there has been a history of | | | | Mediator's guidelines. "A mediator should ensure that |
| abuse or violence, or if mediation is deemed | | | | the parties understand that the mediator's role is that |
| inappropriate under the circumstance s. | | | | of neutral intermediary, not that of representative of or |
| Evaluative mediation | | | | advocate for any party. A mediator should not offer |
| Evaluative child custody mediation is more structured, | | | | legal advice to a party. If a mediator offers an |
| with the mediator actively inserting his or her own | | | | evaluation of a party's position or of the likely outcome |
| opinion in the negotiations. This type of aggressive | | | | in court or arbitration, or offers a recommendation with |
| mediation often occurs when you and the other parent | | | | regard to settlement, the mediator should ensure that |
| are deeply entrenched and have widely different | | | | the parties understand that the mediator is not acting |
| custodial views. In this process, the mediator may | | | | as an attorney for any party and is not providing legal |
| "push" you to settle by pointing out the flaws in your | | | | advice." JAMS Ethics Guidelines for Mediators |
| position. | | | | Private Mediators |
| Choosing a Mediator | | | | Private mediators are not limited to helping you with |
| Whoever mediates your dispute is important. Because | | | | just the basic agreement. You can hire a private |
| you and the other parent cannot agree, you are | | | | mediator who will spend as long as you need, and who |
| looking to a mediator for help in reaching an | | | | will see you at your convenience. Also, a private |
| agreement. This makes the skills and abilities of the | | | | mediator is not going to be asked by the court to |
| mediator crucial to your success. | | | | make a custody recommendation, so your child |
| If your state requires child custody mediation, you may | | | | custody mediation sessions will stay private. |
| end up with a court-appointed mediator. If your state | | | | When you hire a mediator, you have many choices. |
| does not require mediation, or if you choose to move | | | | Therapists often deal better with the emotional |
| your dispute away from court, you can hire a private | | | | aspects, while attorneys or former judges will usually |
| mediator to help you. | | | | know current family law. If you can't find one person |
| Court-Appointed Mediators | | | | who does both, you can hire an attorney-therapist |
| Court-appointed child custody mediators sometimes | | | | team. |